You want to be a lawyer??? Why law school? Why now? How old are you again? And you want to do what? That's three more years of your life? Have you looked at the PRICE?! I thought we finished school early to be done??? Not keep going? Do you know how hard law school is? What's the LSAT? Where will you go? What if you don't get in? and I know I already said this but.... you want to be A LAWYER?
These were just a few of the thoughts that went through my head when it hit me. Jaime, you are going to be a lawyer.
Back to high school...
God has been working on my life for some time now. I guess you could say my whole life up to this decision. I know that's normal, God working on people for their whole lives, but it was just so crazy when it hit me. God has been PLANNING... for me!!! Woah.
If you know me, you know my personality. I am determined, head-strong, sometimes stubborn. I love justice, compassion, and seeing things get finished. I am a perfectionist and also a hard worker. I'm willing to do what it takes to get the grade but more importantly feel accomplished and be able to look at my work with a smile.
The summer of 10th grade, I got asked to apply for a job. A job I didn't want, to earn money I didn't need, and to get experience that I didn't understand. I reluctantly agreed and began a journey of finding my work ethic in the most likely of places. I found myself feeling accomplished in this job and I found myself receiving compliments and promotions. By my senior year I was training other people to do my old job and I was helping with the more important tasks and also the legal work. Legal work scared me at first, but once I got the hang of it, I loved it. It made sense. I knew who was legally correct, I knew who was wrong. It was kind of like complex algebra (i love math too...) and there always was an answer. Hundreds of variables added up to one decision. One decision in my mind, but one ultimate decision in the judges'...
At this point in my life, I wanted to become a teacher: teaching children and helping them reach their full potential. I wanted to be on the front lines and love on these kids even if their life at home wasn't great. I mentored in a 5th grade classroom and although I loved the teacher, I loved the students and I loved the school, I realized very quickly that a teaching job wasn't for me...
College life...
I opted then to go to college as a nursing major, primarily because I still wanted to help children. Nurses make good money and I have always admired my mom for the wisdom she gives me whenever something goes wrong with my body. Again, I didn't like this major. It was boring and I hated the smell of the science hall. The only interesting part I found in this major was the massive amount of hours needed to get a simple A - something I never had experienced before. I dropped that major and then went on a search again for what I wanted to be. I took career tests, I met with counselors, I prayed, I talked to my parents, I talked to my friends, and later that year, I chose the major - Business: Marketing. I honestly still have no idea why. Something about it intrigued me, I guess. I was also excited because I could complete this degree, earning my bachelor's in only three years.
I have loved my major and really, it has prepared me and also shown me what I don't want to do. I don't want to just be just another businesswoman. I don't want to earn a pay check doing something I dread. I want to make a difference, but how? I love marketing, but marketing products? No. Maybe I could market for a non-profit? But I wanted to be more involved directly, I don't just want to be the person behind the scenes, I want to see the action happen and help people directly.
This summer...
After discussing all of this with my parents, we started to talk about graduate school. I decided I either wanted to be a human resource manager or a lawyer. Vastly different choices but those were what I chose. I had no idea what God had in store when I spoke those choices, or what would be revealed to me over the course of the next couple of months.
In July, I went to Uganda and worked in an orphanage - Greenhouse Orphanage. This trip changed my life, heart and mind about what I wanted to be and WHO ultimately, I wanted to become. I helped the children live, I saw their hearts, I saw their bright futures, I experienced first hand the poverty that they face each and every day. I spoke with Kevin, the leader of Greenhouse and the father of the children who had been orphaned and street children. He told me stories of each of their lives, he explained the love he had for each of them even at a young age. He adopted his first child when he was fourteen! I was floored by his faith and by the work that he puts in everyday to help these children live, eat and thrive in their culture. I spoke with him about the process of adoption in Uganda, and then the process of trying to allow adoptions to the United States. The process was messy and longgggg... I was outraged.
Why!!!!? Why are these children, and others like them, in orphanages when there are HOMES where they can be loved for and cared for? Why do they have to wait SO LONG? Why is it so expensive? Who is working on this? Who will help this process?
It was in that moment I realized,
IT IS ME.... I WILL HELP THEM.
Now...
The next months included studying many hours for the LSAT, fighting doubt about my future, fighting doubt that I could really do it. God was so patient with me in those times. Gently pushing me towards open doors on my path, gently encouraging me through my loved ones, gently showing me that he had already prepared the road... So with His help, I did it. I took the LSAT, I applied to my dream law school, I doubted I could get in, I tried to trust that God would provide financially, and I prayed bold prayers believing he would. After all, it's his plan! I'm just the person he is choosing to complete it.
And then... on a very normal afternoon, I got in! And He has already been providing for me financially...
I am so eager to see what the next year holds but more eager to see how the Lord uses me as a Child and Family Lawyer. I want to make a difference, I want to help the fatherless. I want to provide for those who can't help themselves. I want to defend them, I want to serve them, I want to show Christ to them and allow them to find hope in the midst of hopeless situations.
I am still praying daily about this decision, praying for the rest of the finances, praying for the endurance to get through the next 3 and 1/2 years of treacherous studying. I am confident in God and in His power. After all, as I've already said, it's HIS plan. If IT'S ALL GOD, who am I to argue?
Lord, I am ready. I am eager and I am awaiting your next steps in this plan. I am excited to see how you use me. I am excited to see how you show me more of you through this whole process. I cannot wait to see your patience on display and your plan come to fruition. You are so worthy of my praise and you are so worthy of my service. I commit all of this to you. I lay it directly in your hands. Use me as you wish and help me to serve your people. In Jesus' name, Amen.
